Need some cheese for this WHINE!!!!

We will take a break from the regularly scheduled blog post just in time for this breaking news - I SUCK AS A PATIENT!!!

Recovery SUCKS! Maybe I am just venting, spoiled brat that I am, I feel like I can I guess. I have had a super recovery and yet - I am disgusted already :-( Tomorrow is a week since my surgery (I think - what day is it anyways?) and I feel a million times better than the stories I have read. So why am I complaining? I guess I assumed I would be rather knocked out from pain meds and would sleep this part away, but no such luck. Thank God really, I am mostly down to just muscles relaxers for pain. I don't need the major narcs. I just hate the useless feeling. Yeah I know - recovery is hard work but still!

I hate the fear. I wake up with an odd pain and I freak my CSF is leaking or I popped a Dura stitch. I can't process complex writings yet or I would be studying something, I can't be vertical more than 30 minutes without needing narcs and I am trying to wean off them. Sorry, just venting and hoping some will understand. Hubby keeps trying to fix me. Bless his amazing large heart but I am not a computer gone haywire he can tweak or a loose board he can nail down. I just want to cry and eat chocolate - lots of it!! if you made it this far, bless you and thank you for just nodding and saying "uh huh - that's normal"